Why can’t I declare C# methods virtual and static?

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I don’t think you are crazy. You just want to use what is impossible currently in .NET.

Your request for virtual static method would have so much sense if we are talking about generics.
For example my future request for CLR designers is to allow me to write intereface like this:

public interface ISumable<T>
{
  static T Add(T left, T right);
}

and use it like this:

public T Aggregate<T>(T left, T right) where T : ISumable<T>
{
  return T.Add(left, right);
}

But it’s impossible right now, so I’m doing it like this:

    public static class Static<T> where T : new()
    {
      public static T Value = new T();
    }

    public interface ISumable<T>
    {
      T Add(T left, T right);
    }

    public T Aggregate<T>(T left, T right) where T : ISumable<T>, new()
    {
      return Static<T>.Value.Add(left, right);
    }

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